Hate.

Falling snow is one of the most beautiful things in the world,
but everything is always more beautiful in your mind.

Stupid, stupid, stupid expectations, idealism, desire.
Buddha and Nietzsche turn in their graves.

1. A hate (singular, n.): a wrinkled bundle of self-loathing,
like a prune,
only the wrinkles are finer, sharper,
the color like Amerindian leather,
the smell like putrid, sour, acrid,

Ex: I hit the glass on the cabinet today, out of hate.
Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Not fair.

If all your goodness and talents could be counted with numbers, you ought to graph them. I wish they would all add up to the same height, like a row of orange singular bars.
But look, they're all so uneven... Blue is so much better than purple and green and brown...
Perhaps Hitler is the little orange bar in the corner of the box.
Which one would I be?